Perfect Date Ideas - Lets decode it

So we always struggle in our life to find out the perfect plan to spend some quality time with our loved ones or love interest or your potential boyfriend. Whether you’re currently in a relationship or thinking about going back out into the world to find that perfect someone, you would need some time to understand your partner. Then we have a tough time in planning the perfect date and if the planning needs to be done by a Guy (Specially me) then it can turn out to be a disaster in no time.

You need to come up with a good date idea, make sure everything goes smoothly, and still you have something interesting to say while you’re together unless you are sucker in talking like me or you have a person who is too good in communication. This can often be difficult, they are essential.

Let me start with saying that I am no expert in planning dates and giving away ideas but I believe we must consider few points before planning anything for your girl. Otherwise pray to God that your partner should be someone who can plan this for you and you can have relax stress less life and be habitual with those taunts which you will listen throughout your life (If she thinks you might be the one).

Let’s take a look at a very simple formula that will ensure a perfect date every time.

The Meal

The food connection is very important and as I love food so I thought this would be the first point in this list. The meal is the time that the two of you sit down together and have an opportunity to talk to each other. It’s a great time to learn more about her and ask a lot of questions and listen carefully (Have patience and do not stop her in between).

What would you eat is really dependent on who the girl is and where you are in the relationship. You must figure it out basis her choices. Here are few pointers for picking up the restaurant:

      • Quiet is better

      • An Awesome View (it works)

      • Tables are better

      • Always pay the full tab (You are the one who is taking her out)

Find ways to engage with each other

The activity is the second fundamental component of a date. It can be almost anything as long as it involves the two of you being active together. The worst thing you can do is go through all this planning an then spend all your time on your phone or you get involve on small talks in which either one of you are interested in.Find ways to interact and engage with each other. For example, if you are heading out to a restaurant, try coming up with some unique conversation starters to ask each other. 

Second, any guy can take a girl out to dinner. Being able to combine a good meal with a fun conversation is an art. This is where you tell her you’re not like the other guys she’s been disappointed with. It shows her you are fun and will keep her interested.

Focus on Her means put away the phones

The best part about any date is that quality time. So, to maximize that time together, eliminate all distraction. Put the phone on silent or Do not disturb so you can get emergency calls. Some of the cases it is very difficult to get it executed when the girl is workaholic in that case practice patience.

As we are talking about distractions, so if you are in a restaurant, make sure you stay away from TV’s. Even just the announcers and people cheering in the background can take away from the moment. Even if only for a few minutes, that dedicated focus can be so powerful in helping you both connect with each other.

Find out Who She Really Is

Let’s admit that on the first very few interactions and conversations are almost fake. You are both on your best behavior as you maintain eye contact, sitting up straight and taking about non-controversial subjects. You judge each other royally. So basically when you start your conversation with her where you are both able to relax a little and see who the other person really is. This is because you are allowing the person to see through you so that person can decide if she can trust you or she is in interested in you.

These conversations will tell you a lot of the things you want to know about her:

      • Is she fun and can understand your Jokes?

      • Does she have trouble letting her hair down?

      • Do we enjoy being friends with you?

      • Do we able to trust each other and formalities are not there?

      • Are you guys comfortable in talking anything with each other

If you have been in the relationship for a while, you may already know the answers to some of these questions. Let’s not over think it…

Collect memories

Personally I am not good at collecting memories as I get too much involved with the person that forget to click pictures and mark it as a date to remember. When we go to the mountain and into the woods throw away your camera into the lake as I won’t need pictures to remember the moments we create. I believe, when we close our eyes those moments will come in front of you like a picture and those would be perfect. But these might not work for you guys so don’t forget to collect memories! Whether it’s a photo of you both, a little souvenir, or some other memento, having something to look back on can help remind you of those feelings!

Start creating those memories now! You’ll be glad to have them years down the road when you can look back on them and smile.

Few Tips which might come handy

Below are the tips which can be useful and they’re what will get you a second date or keep your long term girlfriend interested.

Music : Music sets the mood. Trust me and if you both have same taste in music then that experience would be beyond words. If you’re somewhere quiet, play some music that matches the mood you want for your date. Even if you are on a road trip music would the vital which will set the mood right.

Flowers : Someone has told me once that there is not a woman alive that doesn’t like flowers. Roses are romantic, but are a little bit played out. Try something different like orchid or lily. I might write some point of time the color code of the expression but for now avoid yellow and that color over signifies friendship.

Privacy : This is not a hard and fast rule as it varies from situation to situation. For example, you don’t want to go to a restaurant where you are the only couple and you don’t want to be in a bar full of people and not be able to hear each other.

Calmness : This is more a mindset than anything. Like most things in life, you can not plan a perfect date and expect everything will fall in place the way you want it to be. Always remember that moment with your loved one is important and rest of the things do not matter. So, be flexible and change things around if needed. The dates that don’t go perfectly are often the most memorable.

Put It Together

There are few more ideas which you can consider as a date for your special person:

1. Pack a picnic and take her for a light hike

2. Go for a road trip to a fun restaurant

3. Go to the zoo and eat at a local burger joint

4. Cook her dinner and Netflix or movie night (This is my favorite idea as I love to cook food for the person I love and care)

Let me close this post by saying that planning is good to give your loved ones the perfect experience. Trust me when you know that your partner is right and feelings are mutual then everything around you will fall into places the way you want them to be. 

If you have any other ideas than these please share with us. It will help in improving my knowledge too!

Quarantined Gyan - Work From Home

In the midst of the new corona virus pandemic, most of the companies have implemented work from home for their employees. This article is dedicated to those people who are affecting my life as they are working tirelessly from Home. Needless to say working from office was not this much stressed. I was never a fan of Work From Home. I tried to explain them over a call as social distancing needs to be followed that there are few ways which you should consider when you are working from home. I think I failed miserably and I believe I should try once again via this post so few other people including me can be saved.

Before I start with all the Gyan, let me tell you that I consider myself as workaholic person but I always keep my thoughts and work organized and I believe unless you are calm inside you cannot give your 100% to the job and you always feel stressed.

It might be for an extended period of time rather than a day here and there. Your whole company is involved. And you can’t necessarily socialize in person outside of work. These tips will help you make sure that you’re managing your work well and you are maintaining your mental well-being:

1. Get Dressed

It’s a crucial step which you should take and trust me it’s a simple tip. I know its tempting to stay in pajamas and shorts all day but you must give away the temptation and test your productivity against other days.

I am not suggesting to dress formally as you might for office, but the simple act of changing clothes servers as a signal that its time to wake up and get the things done. I know that some of you might find this crazy and few of you might call me and tell that how stupid this idea is. Let me misquote SRK’s one dialogue “Don’t underestimate the power of putting on clothes suitable for work. It makes you feel confident and helps draw the line between being at work and being at home,”

Lastly you will keep a check on your wardrobe if you need to buy new clothes post “Lockdown” as you might be eating like there is no tomorrow.

2. Designate a Workspace

One of the biggest challenges anyone can face when it comes to work remotely is keeping your work and home lives different. If you never fully disconnect from work, your work quality will suffer and your home life can take a hit as well. If you’re used to going into an office each day, the division between work and home is physical, and you want to try to recreate that as much as possible with a designated workspace at home.

Try to make your workspace comfortable with a chair you can sit in for eight hours a day. Entering your workspace will help you turn “on” at the beginning of the day and get down to work. On the flipside, leaving your workspace will also help you turn “off” at the end of the day and fully disengage.

The key here is to do whatever you need to do to “leave” your workspace. Some people must understand that.

3. Keep Clearly Defined Working Hours

As you have already designated the work space for your job, you should be clear about when you are working and when you are not. You will get your best work done and be most ready for transition back to the office if you stick to regular office hours. If you are coordinating with multiple teams then be on the same schedule as your teammates. The biggest difference between working from home and working in the office is that you are in charge of your surroundings and have to treat yourself like an employee.

My advice is if you feel yourself extending your work hours because you aren’t doing anything in the evening...tell yourself it’s time to put work away, recharge, and start tomorrow with a fresh mind. The work will be there in the morning.

Let me quote myself “Work can not be finished in one day and you are not the magician”

4. Build Transitions Into Work

Your morning commute not only gets you from one place to another but also gives your brain time to prepare for work. I know someone who loves to drive and spend 3 hours everyday in travelling. She usually do everything in those 3 hours which is scarier even in writing. May be you usually read or listen to music on your commute and you can do the same at home or you can spend sometime with your loved ones or spend that time on a hobby or you can have JAR where you can write 3 Good things happened in your Life last day (This might work as a reminder).

Give yourself something that will signal the end of work and serve as a buffer. When I worked from home, I made it a habit to go out with my cousin to buy vegetables but in “Lockdown” days you can have the call with your friends or people who care about every day. So in case you fail to make a call on someday they will call and remind that your working hours are over.

5. Don’t Get Too Sucked by Anything Else

Distraction is one of the biggest challenges for the people who are working from home. You probably already take a few breaks throughout the day at the office, and that’s fine to do at home, too. Using that time to throw in a load of laundry is OK, but not try to take this window to check new work assignments. Some people can call me when they are on break as I am unemployed currently and need support (making puppy face while writing).

If you’re working remotely because of the new corona virus, checking in on COVID-19 updates is going to be at the front of your mind. It’s good to stay informed, of course, but it’s also easy to scroll yourself into an restless mess.

6. Communicate

If you like your office vibes then the chances are there will be some difficulties in the road when you go remote. The key to get out of this issue is communication especially with your manager and direct reports. You should come up with a plan that lays out expectations from your managers and the projects which you would be handling remotely. Do the same with anyone you usually work collaboratively with throughout the day.

Let me clarify before someone tell me that “You are crazy, this won’t work and this is not possible”. This plan is likely to change as you go. And that’s OK. This is a new situation for everyone. So make sure to circle back and change the plan if problems come up. You’ll also encounter unique challenges as you try to do your job remotely. Don’t hesitate to reach out to the same people you would usually turn to for help—even if you’re not in the same building as them.

Let me conclude this post by saying that “Work From Home” is fun as you have work to do. There is someone who is sitting idle and dependent on few calls and moral support from you guys.

A Girl Who Keeps Her Heart on Her Sleeves - 8 Reasons to Fall in Love

Girls who wear their hearts on their sleeves are a dying breed in our era of cynicism. But, the ones who have this rare and beautiful trait need to protect it. Why they are special... I might not be able to explain as I am very close to one of its kind. Waking up everyday with the thought of knowing her and talking to her everyday keep you sane in your quarantine days.

Listing down 8 reasons why you should date/love/be close to a girl who keeps her heart on her sleeves. Why 8 reasons ? It's my lucky number and I have to stop writing as I have to keep it sweet and crisp.

She Speaks Her Mind

She is the one who would be blunt when it comes to speaking her mind. I use to call her brutally honest. You should know that you can trust her to get real with you every time. She'll be the first one to speak up if she doesn't agree with your decision. She will not try to play " Follow the leader" especially she has the strongest inner compass there in her sleeves.

She's Not Always So Sweet

She is getting tired of being known as the “nice” one in your squad and trust me she enjoys every bit of it. Just to clarify that just because she has a ton of feelings sitting right on her sleeves, that does not make her fragile by any means. She will always make you believe that she is really strong, confident and independent woman. She will not stop until you have the same faith in her (I can vouch for this).

Whenever there is a drama, she will step out and add more Drama to the situation as she loves to do what’s best for her. Why I love this trait or this girl because she will make other people her priority and I believe she should be given a choice to pick herself first too. Life has made her tough and you have to deal with it.

She's Thoughtful

She is a savior for my kind of people when it comes to give each other gifts for any special occasion. You would never know that she has a recording of that incident when you saw some cute outfit or any accessory in the window of your store 6 months ago. She wll pick out the perfect card and save it for your birthday. She is naturally so in tune to other people’s thoughts and feelings.

This gets her into a little trouble too. When she is so thoughtful and you are dumb, she sets the standards really high for you and don’t get what she is looking for in return. My advice, you have to give this girl some reassurance that you care about her just as much (She wont get it most of the time but you have to keep trying :P)

She is Romantic

This girl lives in Yash Chopra movies along with Shah Rukh Khan. So you can guess you are competing against those who have won the girl basis already written scripts. She probably day dream about DDLJ and seriously believes in soulmates. She can always be caught saying, "Awe!" over couples on social media and endless engagement videos.

You'll find her looking for a love story that'll last and she can cry on the same scene endless time. She's honestly the sweetest person to call your partner because she makes the people she cares about such a priority.

My advice, don't take advantage of her romantic heart. She wears it on her sleeve, but needs someone who will understand it just the same.

She is a Great Listener

She is so connected with her thoughts and feelings which makes her very understanding. Having heart to heart with her is always an stirring experience, because she will listen to all your problems and put her best advice forward.

She'll be blunt with you when you need to hear the hard truth, but she'll also let you speak your mind. Sometimes logic just isn't enough and you need someone to speak from the heart.

Improvisation Queen

She is always looking for new things to satisfy her soul. You will notice that she will never settle and runs with her emotion everytime and improvise herself with the situation so she can cope up with outcome. If given a chance and money she will catch the first flight to see a new beautiful place right away. I believe she knows this world has so much to offer to her passionate heart.

My thoughts, this girl is so independent and she knows what she wants at any given point of time but is always open to change her course to grow if required. Trust me you will have a hard time to convince so if you want to be with her just be yourself that would  be much easy than remembering every chat you sent to her.

Driven by Heart

This girl will always follow her heart when it comes to decisions and figuring out anything at work or in life. I at times choose to focus on the logic or go with the gut but she finds the most confidence in her feelings, despite the fact that they could change at any time.

She knows what she is passionate about, and will fearlessly set out to live a life full of love, because its more exciting that way. So before you assume anything about her, you must know that its not all about what you see on the surface. Let me quote someone very close to me “Shashank, You get what you want to see! That’s how universe works”.

She Will Move On with Love, Not Hate

Even if she has these many qualities, she has to experience breakups as most of the time we won’t be able to see the qualities of a person until we lose them. Even girls who wear their hearts on their sleeves experience breakups. She would be heartbroken as you are, she accept the fact that she will always love her EX.

She know she wont ever be “over it” and because of this she is at peace knowing that her EX will remain in her heart always. Which will give her immense pain at times but she is fine with it as she wants to live by that code. She always wants to look back on her relationship with appreciation as she has wished him luck, wholeheartedly. 

My advice, a guy would be lucky to experience love with a girl who keeps her heart on her sleeves.

I'm Sorry that I Disappointed You...!

Dear You (DQ),

You are indeed a great personality - the way you talk, the way you smile, your obsession for success, love for your family. Your passion for your future, your thoughts, the purity in your heart, your friendly nature, your efforts to make me laugh when I feel alone, when I feel so low. Being yourself, being so generous, bold, caring, affectionate. You always pushed me towards success and every bit of this attracted me towards you.

I'm Sorry that I Disappointed You

I know I have disappointed you. But believe it or not, it was never my intention to make you feel that way. In the first place, why would I do that? Why would I hurt you? As they say sometimes people get hurt in the process because they care for each other.

I don't want to think highly of myself, but for you to feel that hurt only means that you care. And for me to be bothered this way also shows that I do care for you.

But I just want you to know, whether I do or don't do things that are beyond your expectations, or whether you get hurt or not in the process, I always care for you and it will never change no matter what happen as you say I can foresee anything. I would like to believe that.

Again, it was not my intention to disappoint you. But I know I cannot hide the truth that I was partly (or fully) at fault for making you feel that way. I am not good at doing such things on regular basis.

I have given you the reason to be disappointed about.

Believe it or not, I am sincerely apologetic for making you feel that way. I apologize for giving you reasons to believe that I can be a certain someone. I am deeply sorry for that.

I can't be sorry for the changes that have happened to me. Because if I do, I'll be saying sorry for being me. Whatever changes that have taken place in my life for the past days or months, are now part of who I am right now. And taking away those changes means taking away who I am.

Even though I was the cause of your disappointments, there is little I can do about that. It is your personal feelings that I cannot control. If only I could replace it with something wonderful so you won't feel hurt, I would do that. But having that feeling is part of who you are, and I don't want to change who you are -- good or bad -- because that is how I met and knew you.

We didn't have enough time to know each other better but I would like to believe that I know you. But I don't usually judge people or relationships based on the length of time they've been together. Because if you care and like to be with that someone, you'll make each day memorable. In that short period of time, we had our good days and bad days, and that's how we learn about each other. And I appreciated every second of it.

I feel bad for leaving because I know, knowing you, everything will not go back to the way it was. But I have hoped that things will be the same, somehow. But even though it's like that, the times and memories I had with you, will never change because they are already a part of me and who I am.

One of the things I really admire about you is your conviction and determination to be the best and for being the best. All my life, I have learned how to be satisfied for what I have. But with you, you pushed me to dream big again and to reach for more.

Thank you for being there to listen. I know that I’m a difficult person to understand but you were keen enough to listen and I am admitting that given the circumstances I hope my decision should be right the way I have planned it.

Thank you for being there for me. I will always remember how you were one of those people who encouraged me to do the best I could in everything I do. Trust me knowing you is one of the best feelings in my life and I can not give it away at any cost.

Yours,

A Man who can see the Future

Soulmates - Did you Find one ?

A soulmate is a person with whom one has a feeling of deep or natural affinity. 

Soul Mates... Soul Connections. We hear about it, read about it and some of us are lucky enough to experience it. We are all curious and most of us want one.

People think a soulmate is your perfect fit and thats what everyone wants... But a true soulmate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding your back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soulmate is probably the most important person you will ever meet because they tear down your walls and smack you awake... but to Live with a soulmate forever ? naah its too painful. Soulmates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you and then Leave. Its not that they do not want to Live with you but they know that staying will make both of them vulnerable and they can not see you that way. They want to be your strength and make you see the world the way you want it.

A Soulmate's purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addiction break your heart open so new light can get in,make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life.

How to identify them is the most important question and might make you curious to read forward:

• You feel overpowered and protected when he/she is around.
• You look into his/her eyes to communicate
• You just get each other all the time (All The Time)
• Its you against the world and you are ready to fight any battle.
• You might even feel an odd sense of déjà vu with them.
• Its Intense may be more intense than normal relationships, in both good and sometimes bad ways.

Hope you will find your Soulmate soon.

A Letter to Maa - Love of Life

Everyone has his favorite superhero or idol, when I was younger, I was infatuated with Super Commando Dhruv (comic Hero). I wished I could be as cool as him in toughest situation and without superpowers I can solve many problems.

Its taken me 18 years to realize that Dhruv is still the coolest superhero but I had a more important superhero in front of my throughout my life: My Mother.

It’s an amazing and humbling feeling when you are able to take a step back and just examine your life in its entirely. You realize how hardships, the high and lows, happiness and sorrow and everyone around you has made you the person you are today.

As I always say people come in your life with stronger motives and plans to teach you and made you a better person. Some will taught you how to become a stronger person or someone might thought you the traits which you must avoid in a person. Everyone in your life is there for a reason which will unfold the mystery of life.

I feel that the people even at my age (I am not very Old) are afraid to show their true emotions and thoughts to anyone cause they are afraid of being mocked and they think they might be considered as weak by their friends and peers.

I think if someone truly means something to you then you should tell her or him as often as you can. The intent of this letter is to let you, MOM, know how much you mean to me and to also hopefully inspire other sons and daughters to take a second and hold those moments and emotions.

Trust me being the most practical sons of yours, I wish I could keep you with me forever even if I know that’s impossible, until then I will make sure you understand how fortunate I am to have you as my Mom. I wish I could share even a small percentage of the unconditional love you have given to me with those people who grew up without that love cause I believe everyone deserves a mother’s love.

You are my number one Fan. Having you day in day out to support you and listen to you is one of life’s most powerful gifts. I do not know which superpower gives you the visibility to find the something which is being misplaced by me and you somehow know the exact location of it in the house.

There have been times when I questioned your actions, but only now do I understand that everything you did to me and for me was out of love. You said yes as often as possible, but weren't afraid to tell me no. You let me be expressive and creative without questioning it.

You showed me how to treat others with kindness, compassion and love. It's you who I believe has made me into a man, capable of expressing myself and my emotions, unafraid of being vulnerable, comfortable in my own skin and able to fully love and respect women.

The best thing about having you as my mom is that I'm still learning from you every single day. I know I haven't been the best son in the world. I've upset you; I've given you headaches. It's unfortunately part of the many phases every son and daughter growing into an adult has.

You have always been there in my achievements and accepting my failures. You never let me give up my dreams, no matter what obstacles were in my way of life. You have firm faith on me even when there were times, I didn’t believe in myself.

Don't ever doubt that you didn't do enough for me or have a single ounce of regret. You are more than I could have asked for in a mother. You are (and always will be) the caped caregiver and superhero of my life.

Love you Ma!

My Dad is My Super Hero!

No Matter how hard Life would be or what challenges it throws at you, In Any of the cases you have to look back and you will find your father there for you. Even if he comes home late from work and will not be able to give more time to you but he cares and want only the best for you. I remember my childhood days when I used to think he is the guy who can do anything in this world and I am totally in control and safe when she is around. He is my superhero till date.

I thought to make this day special for him, I thought about gifts, party and plans but finally I thought of writing this note. Without him I won’t be a human being which I have imagined throughout my life. Below are the reasons why he is supercool Dad for me (Listed only 10). .

·         Dad has always tried his level best to make me a good human being.

·         I always enjoy spending time with him and learn new things with him.

·         He wants me to become a good human being like him. That is why he always teaches me to differentiate between wrong & right.

·         Every day he used to take out little time for me in the night to acknowledge my day to day activities and problems if any.

·         He is my best friend. I can discuss everything with him without any hesitation. Things that I fail to reveal out to my close friends, I can easily discuss them with my Dad.

·         He is like a hero to me. He is a funny, cool, adventurous and smart human being

·         He has showed me the opportunities that exist in front of me. But at the same time he has left the decision up to me in terms of which path to choose.

·         He is very confident that his efforts to make me a good human being will never go in vein. Seeing his confidence in me some day I want to make him proud.

·         Whenever I feel low he is just a call away and his voice on phone saying “What Happened, Batayega Nahi” just makes me comfortable and gives me courage to fight the world.

·         He taught me that people are not wrong or right circumstances make them to behave like one. He is the guy who brings positivity out of any situation and consoles me in the bad phase of my life.

In short he is the reason I feel relaxed and full of energy in my life. His confidence in me gives me power to take the world down if require. One of his favourite quotes defines life for me “If you cannot do anything for a person, give him hope to fight the circumstances in that way you will win that person for LIFE”.

Love you Dad!