Happy Birthday to Me - 26 June (Cancerian)

Generally, I’m not that enthusiastic about celebrating my own birthday. It’s not that I hate it, exactly, but I just don’t see the need to make a big fuss about it every year. Every year my friends and colleagues do not forget to make this day special... However this Birthday was not at all memorable that is the reason I wanted to pen it down so I can refer it whenever I feel down in Life. Just highlights only 5 people wished me on this day (cant blame my friends as I have deleted by FB) even if I have very less social circle, Family issues, Doctors visits multiple times & End of the day some drama with someone turned this day as a nightmare to remember...! Another reason to write this post because I have felt that I must have a plan for my Birthdays which I have decided to celebrated alone...!!

Most of all, though, the reason I no longer look forward to my birthdays as much as I once did is that I’m missing a key person to celebrate with me. My Grand Mother passed away in 2020 same date. My birthday just have not been the same since and it turned out to be a nightmare after that it not about the said incident but it reminds me all the negative memories.

Spending your birthday alone might leave you feeling lonely. Birthdays are generally fun when you are a child. As you grow older, birthdays become a trouble for some in that they are a reminder that you are getting older.

On the other hand, if you've never enjoyed birthdays, this day of the year may bring back bad memories. Even if you find yourself alone on your birthday this year, try to make it a special day. If you start planning now, you will find it is not that hard. There are lots of possibilities. This I learnt this year when I felt that we are so much dependent on people and have sky high expectations which are not mutual. So thought to give myself a break as next year might be even tougher when I might not receive 12 AM messages for my birthday. I must be ready with worst case scenarios.

My birthday was Yesterday, and while I normally love planning a solo celebration for myself alongside something more social or with family, all of my go-to options were off the table. I couldn’t take myself to dinner and a movie. I couldn’t do any fancy stuff this time as alcohol was off limits and late night calls when you are high ( I missed this the most). I have never felt the enthusiasm of birthday this year and I always say that next year should be better than this year as “This could be my Low but I could not make this day to my Lowest”. I thought a lot and did loads of overthinking and after watching Netflix series I decided to write this post so I could not forget this day and it would be reminder to me that next year would be awesome (Hope is the key). Here are just a few things I thought of to do when you are alone and feeling lonely on your Birthday or for any Day:

Consider getting away for your birthday: This was the TOP on the list I could do next year or I would plan doing whenever I feel like not doing regular stuff or being bored of being nice. Traveling solo means you wont have to worry about coordinating your schedule with anyone else nor you have to do compromises. So If I want to lay down on beach then I will go instead of going towards hills as it would be my chance to do exactly what I want. No Judgement and Phone would be OFF!

If at all possible, try to make travel plans a few weeks in advance in order to get the best deals. This will include making decisions about transportation, making hotel reservations, and packing for your trip.

Do some pointless online shopping: I know you might be searching for this phrase “treat yourself to something nice” seems too obvious to include but hear me out. Most of the time I always ordering necessities even when I’m not, I’m buying something I’ve been planning on treating myself to for a while or making a weird impulse buy I saw recommended on social media.

So on this birthday I gave myself a budget and decided to just… browse without having any goal in mind. It might feel like the same as wandering the mall looking for something unexpected and special, but it scratched the same itch.

Have a good old fashioned movie marathon: I just love watching movies so I can tell you by my experience nothing is more soothing than binge watching your favorite movies or series. Whether you want to re-watch an old favorite or catch up on that one show you’ve been meaning to watch, spending the day falling in without the pressure of accomplishing anything else is a perfect birthday gift to yourself.

Think about the benefits of getting older : I know this would be hard to understand but trust me it is a best way experience that how good you are becoming by passing each year. Getting older is a privilege denied to many so we should be humble about this and think this as blessing. You may feel good as when you were in college you might not look as dapper as you look right now. You can take your won decisions and can live with the outcome of those decisions too. Go through old Facebook albums or search for your birthdate on your phone’s photo gallery. Hell, maybe even go through old photo albums if you have them to really throw it back.

Appreciate the people who are thinking of you: Letting the people we care about know how much they mean to us has a positive, healing benefit for us and for our loved ones as well. There is nothing like being reminded that a person is constantly in your thoughts, with the reminder expressed in a most sincere way. You should not burn those people who have wishes you on this day and make you feel loved and special. I has to say the following messages to these people who remembered this day:

Do you know I never ever feel bored, never ever feel lonely, because you are always in my thoughts and thank you for all the positive influences you had on my life…!

Have a read-a-thon: Have you ever experienced the day in elementary school or in college library where you do not do anything but read all day. Your favourite book and consider to re create that magic as an adult. Your birthday is the perfect time to sit down with a book you've been dying to read. Start that novel or non-fiction book you have had on your list. Clearing your schedule to lose yourself in a great book or two might be the soothing, off-the-grid birthday you’re looking for. I am reading this book currently – An enquiry concerning Human Understanding.

You can Cook (if you like): There is something soothing about cooking whenever I feel SAD or distant or clouded, I just go to the kitchen and cook my favorite food (which I can cook). Not only does it engage all of your senses, but it’s also very rewarding to make a bunch of ingredients come together to form something delicious you can enjoy. If you’re not the most experienced self proclaimed master chef then go easy on yourself. You can choose a ridiculously easy recipe like Korean Noodles or Maggi (with lot of water). The finished product doesn’t have to be pretty or masterful, but it will be a delicious gift to yourself.

Start Fresh – Look Test: I wont do this ever as it is very difficult to look good when GOD was not being kind on you but you can use this opportunity to start fresh in some area in your life. Go the traditional route and do a makeover on your outside. That might mean a new haircut, new outfit, or even something a little riskier like a tattoo. Choose styles that give you confidence and a new outlook. I am thinking to have a Tattoo which will read “एकोहम द्वितीयोनास्ति”

Unwind and relax before bed. As your solo birthday winds down, find a way to relax and pamper yourself just a bit more. Take a steamy shower or a long soak in the tub. Think about purchasing a super-soft, relaxing, new pair of pajamas as one of your presents to yourself. Always remember you are the Hero in your story.

Eventually when I will be doing these things in my next birthday, one thing I am gonna do for sure i.e. switching off my phone for 72 hours and take a break from universe. As they say if you do not feel important or desirable try ghosting people. 

Happy Birthday to me!

Yes... I am a Capricorn Girl / Guy

As they say without observations you are not as human as you should be and somehow, I believed in this. Even I did not care to validate the saying. Most of the time we believe the only concept which is called “theory of convenience”. I have always tried to write about my experience, feelings and people around me so I can create a blog which I could refer when I will be sitting idle alone after 40 years.

There was someone who tend to tell me all the stupid things happening around him/her and I always pretended that I was listening. Few more people around me are Capricorn and keeping all those feelings and knowledge intact, I decided to write this post. One of the Capricorn has asked me recently as what I think about her, This is my reply and I hope it will reached to her via a Cancerian.

Capricorns are born between December 22nd and January 20th and belong to the Earth element of the zodiac. The Earth sign crew are all practical, self reliant, passive and ambitious. You would want them in your corner... but maybe not at a party. When we specifically talk about female Capricorn, the Capricorn women of the world can vary greatly when it comes to their looks, cultures, hobbies, and careers. All these Capricorn zodiac traits are more or less superficial. Although the Capricorn females are often different from each other on the outside, they are alike in the way they think and feel about many topics. This makes them great partners in life, as well as friends or collaborators.

Have you ever wondered what is it that makes Capricorn tick?

#1: Responsible

I have seen them to be accurate at keeping track of important things such as passwords, birthdays and all-important stuff which I considered as not so important (read useless). They own up the mistake and their learning capability allow them to move forward with force and allow them to successfully use these mistakes at the road to glory. They already as hard working and ambitious which makes them highly responsible types with a mature, rational, and disciplined approach to following the rules and pursuing their goals.

#2: REALISTIC (read: pessimistic)

They say they are realistic but I defined them as pessimistic. Their feet are so rooted that sometimes they will only focus on the negatives rather than the possibilities of positives. I am being told that Capricorns are being practical and grounded and want to see all the aspect before taking a decision. According to me being practical and grounded isn't always a good thing, especially when it causes you to focus on all the negatives in life.

When these people think too much about how things look rather than how things feel for them, they get stuck in a cycle of negativity and mood swings which makes other signs very helpless in convincing this zodiac. They want things to be perfect and Perfectionism is a problem for many Capricorns, as it frequently causes them to perceive failure as the ultimate dissatisfaction.

#3: AMBITIOUS (read: workaholic)

They are very obsessed and determined to show other people what they are made of. They are extremely ambitious people with lofty goals they're sure that they can fulfill, as long as they continue to work hard and put in as much effort as possible. They are always striving to do better, better than themselves and better than others⁠—and this force is what ultimately sustains them during those long, exhausting hours they dedicate to whatever it is they're trying to achieve.

I can say with surety if you are looking for someone to partner with on a project, a Capricorn should definitely be one of your top choices!

#4: Hardworking

Capricorns are one of the most serious, diligent signs of the zodiac. They are persistent when it comes to specific tasks, such as work-related projects and school papers, and work hard to ensure they get the result they want (whether that's a promotion or an A+, for example). This trait is by far one of the best things about Capricorns: they never give up!

Being a workaholic puts a ton of stress and pressure on Capricorn and is one way the sign works against its biggest strength. Since Capricorns can be extremely hard on themselves, it's advisable that they take the occasional break to concentrate on their physical and emotional health.

In short, never underestimate the tenacity of a Capricorn, I have never underestimated for sure!

#5: Stubborn

High on ambition and diligence makes this sign stubborn and they believe in holding high standards. As they value tradition and have a very strict way of thinking which makes it difficult for them to have open mind and you will find it almost impossible to change their mind. They're just too focused on the practical and worldly side of things to look beyond themselves.

In my opinion, its their way or the highway, a mentality that makes it understandably difficult for people to get along well with Capricorn.

Capricorns might be overly practical and stubborn at times, but they're also devoted and loyal to those they love. Please find below an overview how these people behave in relationships:

#Capricorn in Love

As we already know that they are a bit stiff and reserved but that does not mean they cant be an ideal partners. Trust me once you get to know a Capricorn on a deeper and more personal level, they will stay committed to you for life. You have to take a chance to get them to open up emotionally and trust me its worth for their loyalty. When it comes to romantic relationships, the Capricorn personality is an unusual combination of intensely devoted but lacking in emotion.

Sometimes I feel that they treat their romantic relationship as their Job in which they put in all the efforts. This practical approach can sometimes make the relationship feel clinical or unnatural but that’s not the case as it is just the way Capricorn best express their feelings.

#Capricorn in Family and Friendship

As this is established that Capricorns are loyal and hardworking which makes them more reliable person and they would be always there for you. As they are one of those who remember all important things hence they tend to feel strong connections to family traditions and their past, and generally look forward to birthdays, holidays, and communal dinners where they can enjoy in their memories with loved ones.

Outside family, Capricorns usually only have a few close friends but are reliable and will remain close to them for life specially with those who get to connect with them intellectually.

#Capricorn in Business

Capricorns do well in almost any type of job, so long as it affords them stability and the opportunity to succeed professionally (read: make a lot of money). If you want to get best out of them you have to make them in-charge of the work environment. As mentioned, this sign is known for pulling all-nighters and working until exhaustion, which can be both a good and a bad thing.

#Yes, I am a Capricorn Girl

Known for her sarcastic personality and dry sense of humor, a usually quiet Cap may surprise you with her loud belly laugh when something amuses her. Often described as conventional and traditional, many Capricorns are the secret weirdos of the Zodiac. She is Not one to wear their hearts on their sleeves, they may not give you any idea how they really feel. Learning to communicate clearly in the moment is always a boon to this stable and grounded earth sign, as she can often get stuck in her own ways. She always want to labelled everything in her world and find it difficult to shift from Plan A to plan B even if Plan B is awesome. Serious, focused, and hard-working, it’s great when a Capricorn can let loose a bit and find time to have fun, even though even her outings and vacations are carefully planned ahead of time.

At the end a Cap can be a role model for 21^st century people, some time their appearances are deceiving as few of them can keep up  appearances by putting smile their face and sounding happy even when they're battling demons, depressed, and finding little joy in their accomplishments or in their day-to-day life.

This post will become the longest and most of the time you may also loose the interest. Those of us that a born under the this zodiac sign are often the hardest workers of the zodiac and love nothing more than getting ahead in life. They are ambitious, determined, materialistic and strong.

No wonder they are always ahead of the curve! Don't you think they're just great?

Happy Birthday from Unbeatendesire!

 Dear Birthday Girl,

Cheer up. Take courage. “The truth is that getting older is nothing to be feared. Its make you unique in its own ways”. As the years go by, you gain a perspective not found in younger years. Mysteries of why things happened years ago start to clear up. You can see how the pieces of life fit together. Using thoughtful retrospection, the older you become, the more life makes sense.

You are indeed a great personality - the way you talk, the way you smile, your obsession for success, love for your family. Your passion for your future, your philosophical thoughts, clarity about your life, the purity in your heart, control over your emotions, your friendly nature, your efforts to make me laugh when I feel alone, when I feel so low. The way you turn every intense situation into something positive and sometimes light. Being yourself, being so selfless, adventurous, caring, affectionate and Crazy. 

We have not known each other for a long time, about a year and a half at most. But I do know this; I have feelings for you. What I do know for certain is that you are kind, beautiful and one of the most fantastic people I have ever known. You are precious to me and I couldn't bear to see you hurt. I would just about lose my mind. I am the kind of person who would like to hide behind blogs and open letters, when it comes to talking about my feelings, I'm not the best at it. I just don't enjoy addressing matters of the heart.

Let's be honest... we're practically polar opposites. However, we have enough similarities to get along, I think. Here are a few reasons why I like the hell out of you and why you should be super excited about your birthday (Yes, I'm writing a list of the reasons. I warned you):

• You're really good at what you do and you're so passionate about it. Who wouldn't admire that? A damned hater, that's who! 
• You are so supportive of me. The other day I was feeling really down, and I shared with you what I was going through. You listened and offered words of encouragement in a way that showed you really do care. You'd never just give me the whole "Stop complaining because many people would love to be in your shoes" response that so many people give; that response has inspired me to NOT open up about my feelings when I'm going through hard times. But you don't do that to me. You're just there for me. It means a lot. Yeah.
• I love talking to you on the phone. I like getting excited when I realize I've got a text from you. You are may one of the favorite notification on Whatsapp.
• My life is pretty weird and unpredictable. Sometimes because of my career and my personal issues. With you, it is like everything is normal and so peaceful and I have never felt the same way for years.
• I think you deserve the world, yet somehow I don’t think you always see that. But I want you to know, I often find my own self wondering what I did to deserve you.
• You taught me what a connection really is and I got crazy when you told that You come in to people’s lives with a purpose and you change them. You make every single person around you better, without even realizing it.
• You’re the person that someone can only live without, if they’ve never lived with them before. You light up every room, and lift up every single person around you. People need you.
• You get to know them down to their very core, even when they’re hard to get to know. You go to war for the people that you love, and do it without even thinking. Love isn’t an option for you. It’s just who you are and it makes you the most beautiful soul I have ever known. Because your love isn’t fearful, or weak. It’s the most powerful force that I have ever felt—indestructible and unconditional.
• If for any reason, we ever fight about something, and I mean really fight about something, I will always want to fix it. I hope you stay around for a long time, because I want you in my life forever. You have made my life so much better since you entered it and the memories that we have made together are one in a million. With that being said, I hope you know how much I appreciate you, how much I appreciate everything that you do for me. And I hope that you know I would do anything for you, without even hesitating because you're my best friend.

I could have written a lot of things as you know but I am not going to make this post boring for you so sub listing few points for which you should be happy as its you 18th Birthday with 12 year’s experience: 

1. You have the ability to create a smile and trust me that you have a beautiful smile that erases all the worries away.
2. Your happiness is contagious and you have the perfect timing in entering a person’s life.
3. You are candid in the most positive way.
4. You can stay for as long as you’re needed and A simple “Hi” from you is something worth hearing.
5. You know how to tease and not make a person angry. I can vouch for that.
6. You make a heart beat fast… and faster and your stare is worth a smile.
7. Your genuinely say “sorry” and I don’t know how you do it.
8. Your heart is as big as your soul and you give good advice even if the situation doesn’t coincide with your life.
9. You have principles and you follow them.
10. You love your God (YOUR) more than anybody.
11. You pick your closest friends and don’t forget them.
12. When the temperature rises, you choose to go to sleep and put your phone on “Airplane Mode” and I hate it.
13. You don’t make someone feel bad.
14. You avoid wars just as you always find peace.
15. You trust that your thoughts are true.
16. You are not afraid to question things.
17. You’re brave because you want to.
18. You love conversations and people might not know but you are easy to talk to.
19. Your silence is magical and it put me revisit all the conversation where I could be wrong.
20. Your soul is beautiful in every single way.
21. You stand by what you believe in life and for that you follow and break rules at the same time.
22. You don’t really assume that the society’s standards are all true.
23. You love yourself and trust me you would never walk alone because you are loved by people.
24. You don’t fake your emotions and you try to explain your self but don’t expect to be understood.
25. You know how to keep secrets and Friendship with you is an exciting adventure and you can walk a mile on someone’s shoes.
26. You are not afraid to make a mistake and your opinions always matter.
27. You won’t be forgotten easily and you don’t compete in attention – you don’t need to.
28. You are not someone to be liked; you are someone to be loved.
29. Your genuineness will stay forever.
30. You are special, and you may not know it.

Thank you for sticking by me, getting to know my life, showing me the most sincere support and unconditional care. I couldn't thank you enough for the countless amount of times that you have stuck by me when I needed you. I have no idea what I'd do without you sometimes... or all of the time. And I am so happy that I don't ever have to find out.

Even I am not happy with wrinkles and thinning hair when we grow more older as every year is a single step reaching to that destination. But I love getting older. It is a sweet time in life. Embrace it. Go ahead. I dare you. Fall in love with getting older.

Happy Birthday…! Don’t count your wrinkles count your blessings!

Yours!

Ji chang Wook